I really liked the idea that safety can outlive the danger that created it. We don't always carry the past because we can't let go. Sometimes we're carrying strategies that once made perfect sense, and that's a very different place to begin from. The hardest patterns are often the ones that once made perfect sense.
this gave me a lot of hope, and i hope it gives others just as much. you are not at fault for your environment but you have the ability to become better than it. thank you!
You should be make present and future in the right way. do good deeds and getting energetic life without guilt because you're a human being and you can understand your nature ,flaws and about mind because every person try to keep in the living in the destiny of the lifetime achievement award because some person live for destiny and present some persons died from past because they can't understand and weak from the past. Life happens live to life with heart, mind &healthy.
I saw this video a few years ago. It was rather remarkable how quickly the baby reacted when the mother just shut down. No reaction from mom at all while the baby went immediately into “look how cute I am” mode. Then after a minute or so the mother returned attention and affection to the child and the baby was happy. But he was seriously distressed for a moment.
It’s stunning when you think how many kids are actually neglected. How dramatically that minute mom cut off contact affected the child. Imagine the poor kids that never know a parent’s love from the beginning.
Lina this was heartbreaking in the best way. The ache of internalizing the lack of attention or needs being unmet as a child. You were absolutely right a child doesn’t process that as something outside of their control they internalize it as something being retracted or left unheld. I loved this article thank you for sharing!
I am 81 years old and still a product of my childhood upbringing, both good and bad. You learn over time to manage your life as best you can, but you will always be influenced by those early experiences. I was disciplined with a complete withdrawal of parental recognition, as if I were invisible. I think it was worse than corporal punishment.
Wow. I need more. I've never read my exact experience like this before. Ive told numerous people in my life about being too scared to ask my parents for sleepovers, etc because sometimes a blowup would follow. But that's only one example.
I enjoyed this because impossibility often says more about the boundaries of our current model than the boundaries of reality itself. Many of the greatest shifts in science, philosophy, and personal growth began with experiences that didn't fit the prevailing framework. That doesn't mean every extraordinary claim is true, but it does mean curiosity should come before dismissal. Sometimes the impossible is simply reality waiting for a larger map.
I really liked the idea that safety can outlive the danger that created it. We don't always carry the past because we can't let go. Sometimes we're carrying strategies that once made perfect sense, and that's a very different place to begin from. The hardest patterns are often the ones that once made perfect sense.
a childhood trauma that still lingering deep through me still. i still resent them tbh. my parents. for ruined me like this.
This line stayed with me:
“The habits that once protected you eventually start protecting themselves.”
Yes.
I recognize so much of what you name here from the inside.
Learning the room.
Reading the silences.
Shrinking before anyone asked.
Monitoring everyone else’s weather.
Treating visibility, need, mistakes, or directness as danger.
Those patterns can feel so woven into the self that it is hard to imagine life without them.
But they are not the self.
They are often a cluster of nervous system imprints — old predictions the body learned in moments that were too much to process at the time.
And I want to say clearly: those patterns can absolutely resolve at that level.
Not just be understood.
Not just be managed.
Resolved.
I have lived that.
I am still living that.
The body can stop organizing around rooms that no longer exist.
<33
this gave me a lot of hope, and i hope it gives others just as much. you are not at fault for your environment but you have the ability to become better than it. thank you!
Insightful...I feel seen. Thank you for sharing:)
You should be make present and future in the right way. do good deeds and getting energetic life without guilt because you're a human being and you can understand your nature ,flaws and about mind because every person try to keep in the living in the destiny of the lifetime achievement award because some person live for destiny and present some persons died from past because they can't understand and weak from the past. Life happens live to life with heart, mind &healthy.
<3
why is it yelling
👀
So insightful. You give such a visceral, physical weight to how we carry childhood survival into our adult lives. thank you.
I saw this video a few years ago. It was rather remarkable how quickly the baby reacted when the mother just shut down. No reaction from mom at all while the baby went immediately into “look how cute I am” mode. Then after a minute or so the mother returned attention and affection to the child and the baby was happy. But he was seriously distressed for a moment.
Breaks your heart to watch it play out so obviously like that :/ like you said it happens so quickly but still has such a big impact
It’s stunning when you think how many kids are actually neglected. How dramatically that minute mom cut off contact affected the child. Imagine the poor kids that never know a parent’s love from the beginning.
!! <3
Couldn’t even finish reading it at the moment, hits home all to well. Thanks for re stacking
<33
Lina this was heartbreaking in the best way. The ache of internalizing the lack of attention or needs being unmet as a child. You were absolutely right a child doesn’t process that as something outside of their control they internalize it as something being retracted or left unheld. I loved this article thank you for sharing!
Thank you for taking the time to read this one <3!
I am 81 years old and still a product of my childhood upbringing, both good and bad. You learn over time to manage your life as best you can, but you will always be influenced by those early experiences. I was disciplined with a complete withdrawal of parental recognition, as if I were invisible. I think it was worse than corporal punishment.
Wow. I need more. I've never read my exact experience like this before. Ive told numerous people in my life about being too scared to ask my parents for sleepovers, etc because sometimes a blowup would follow. But that's only one example.
I need to know what to do next...
I enjoyed this because impossibility often says more about the boundaries of our current model than the boundaries of reality itself. Many of the greatest shifts in science, philosophy, and personal growth began with experiences that didn't fit the prevailing framework. That doesn't mean every extraordinary claim is true, but it does mean curiosity should come before dismissal. Sometimes the impossible is simply reality waiting for a larger map.
:))